This is my first penny. I'm not sure exactly where this will lead. I can tell you that I enjoy discussing politics, religion, and relationships Oh yes, the most diverse discussions come from these three. Somehow, it sooths the soul when one can openly discuss such matters.
My blog tonight actually deals with relationships. I read a funny article today on Yahoo.com. The question was "why are men so upset?"
I've attached the article so that you all can see the full text. You can find it at the bottom of the blog. To best summarize the content is that men are upset because women expect men to still pay for dinners when women make just as much money if not more. It also states that men would rather sit at home, search porn and play playstation then have to deal with trying to full-fill the endless needs of a woman. Basically women are so demanding on men, that men have given up.
There are bigger issues that yet to have been addressed. Mens roles in life are defined by society as being the bread winner. Women are told to be true to themselves and love unconditionally. However, when we get out there and look around, none of what we are told about the opposite sex seems to be true. We feel betrayed by our idealisms of youths past. Nothing is wrong with women wanting equality at the work place or in bed. However it should be noted, women have just as easily given up on looking for prince charming. It would seem that many of todays men in the 20's to early 30's are basically 10 year old boys with executive positions who play playstation on a "subprofessional" level.
Women on the other hand or nothing if not a puzzle where no single option or answer ever fit perfect. Men expect women to be clear, upfront, and easier to read than a Dr. Sues book. This is because men in nature are simplistic, and complexity is not our strong suit. If the other issue is sex, well the truth is men can't seem to muster up the testicular fortitude to ask a woman out, or even approach one, without fulfilling the duty of being a jerk first as to keep face in-case friends are watching. Perhaps, if men weren't so scared to approach women with confidence, or the belief that they can offer that woman the best night of her life rather than being scared of rejection, less men would be upset. Truth is, that in the article is states more men are looking at porn more often. This only goes to prove that mens self confidence is nothing short of hilarity and better off for women and other men anyways.
Now I do realize that divorce has raised mens awareness to "gold-diggers". However, in the times we are living we don't have much gold, but what we do have, we want to keep. Why should men have to carry the burden of debt in a divorce? If women want equality in every aspect of life, why not in divorce as well?
I can only imagine how many ways that could be argued on both sides. Women say that men have made them stay home to raise the children and keep the house tidy. Men could argue that we don't live in the 1950's anymore, and both parties are working to pay the bills. In some cases women are the bread winners and men stay home to do chores and keep the children.
I guess the reality is that the times have changed again. For most of history men have dominated every arena that men have created. Its only just recently the women have had the right to vote. I don't believe our forefathers could have seen the changes that are in place today happen so quickly. Some of us remember our mothers putting hot food on the table for father and doing dishes afterwards. Some of us experienced nothing more than two people who shared in all duties and never knew of inequality. Growing up from a boy to a man defines you as being tough, decisive, and the Alfa of your group. However todays women hold just as much power or perhaps even more.
I don't feel men have really ever completely understood women. History up to this point never demanded that we do. Now things have changed, we are aware of this change, yet unaware of how to cope with it.
I say embrace the change, and perhaps, you will find that women recognize this and in turn see your confidence. Confidence in the right amount is a natural aphrodisiac.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/dailybeast/20110228/ts_dailybeast/12649_whyaremenangrymanningupauthorkayhymowitzexplains;_ylt=AtJxNILf1ZyCKapn8V66FLPDr7sF;_ylu=X3oDMTQ1Z2syZzlrBGFzc2V0A2RhaWx5YmVhc3QvMjAxMTAyMjgvMTI2NDlfd2h5YXJlbWVuYW5ncnltYW5uaW5ndXBhdXRob3JrYXloeW1vd2l0emV4cGxhaW5zBHBvcwM0MwRzZWMDeW5fcGFnaW5hdGVfc3VtbWFyeV9saXN0BHNsawN3aHlhcmVtZW5zb2E-
I believe a number of sociological ideas touch upon this, but perhaps the greatest is the idea of societal pressures, instinctual tendencies, and present social norms conflicting with one another. Instinct and genetic influences tell us what we want and what role we should play. Watch any study of men/women sexual interaction and you will be surprised at how animalistic we really are. In addition we have the defined roles set forth by thousands of years of civilization, most of which have only recently decade. Both conflict with our current family/relationship ideas. The truth is we live in a replaceable society. Relationships are no longer about permanence. Just like your TV, when your relationship fails you, you throw it out the door. We don't fix things. But, with all this said, I think the nature of relationships touches on our current methods of social/human interraction. This is behavioral. All relationships rely on the 3 C's: Communication, Compromise, and Committment. Communication is perhaps the greatest, possibly because it inherently includes the others. Communication is more than just talking, it's listening, interpreting, reasoning, interacting, and rationalizing. People do not know how to do this anymore. It's a rare and truly forgotten art. And, this more than anything, i feel, is the reason that the state of today's relationships are in such disarray.
ReplyDeleteOften times our views of others and our relationships with them, spawns not with them, but from ourselves. It is also the product of our childhood and the parental influences which have carved us from the raw ore of youth. If you want to understand how someone will treat someone else, first look at how they treat themselves.
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